A movie that wants to be 15 other movies
Fans of the G.I. Joe franchise had to wait eight years between G.I.Joe: Retaliation and finally seeing Snake Eyes: G.I. Joes Origins. They had to have been thinking about the potential for a series of origin stories for their favorite Joes – the original Joe Colton, Duke, Flint, Lady Jaye, and Roadblock, to name a few.
They were also probably trying to cover up any concerns that the Joe’s origins series might follow the path of another potential franchise. X-Men Origins: Wolverine was a disaster in so many ways that there was never another film made in the franchise despite decades of comic book resources to pull from.
Unfortunately for Snake Eyes, history may have repeated itself.
Some Joe fans are going to dislike the movie because it changes so much of the titular character’s comic book backstory. The mute ninja never shows his face in years of comics and cartoons. In the film, he is played by the funny and charismatic Henry Golding (Crazy Rich Asians.) Golding isn’t the problem with the movie. It’s the meandering storytelling, the dozen or so subplots, and some of the visuals that make the movie a disaster.
The cast is super talented. Andrew Koji’s Tommy Arishakage/Storm Shadow is engaging. He is loyal to a fault but doesn’t see the long goal. Takehiro Hira is the perfect vengeance-driven villain. Peter Mensah is perfectly cast as Blind Master. Samara Weaving gives just enough of a peek behind Scarlett’s poker face. Ursula Corbero is vicious as the Baroness.
The film’s biggest problem is that it wants to tell everyone’s story. Even with a two-hour runtime, so many of the characters are underserved. Director Robert Schwentke tries to tell Snake Eyes’ origin, Tommy’s origin, Kenta’s vengeance story, a heist, a revenge film, a martial arts movie, a western, and the beginnings of G.I.Joe and Cobra. It’s simply too much.
The movie then adds in the elements of mysticism, including a jewel that can make enemies burst into flame, and not one, but three gigantic CGI snakes. Stephen Sommers tried to cram a lot into 2009’s G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra, and nearly pulled it off through flashbacks and expository dialogue. Even the director of The Mummy bit off more than he could choose. Schwentke certainly pulled off a “hold my beer” approach with Snake Eyes.
I’m hopeful for a more constrained sequel that pivots to the overall Joe/Cobra story. Weaving and Corbero deserve their screen time and a focus on their characters. I am not holding out hope. Between COVID’s impact on box offices, the critical and online response to the movie, and the X-Men precedent, the Joe origins franchise might be sunk.
A(nother) might be the key to rebooting the Joes yet again. It might be time to adapt one of the best accepted storylines from the comics. Otherwise, fans might be waiting another eight years for the next installment of G.I.Joe in theaters.